This is a battle I often find myself fighting in my own head. See, I'm not exactly skinny. Who am I kidding? I am not skinny at all. That whole Big Beautiful Woman category? I definitely fit it.
Which, in my opinion, is not okay. Yeah, yeah, I know, I am gonna get a bunch of shit for this, but bear with me. I'm not some skinny girl sitting at a computer talking smack about bigger people. Just bear with me. I have my reasons for feeling this way as a bigger person.
Ever since the whole "anti fat shaming" movement started in the nineties, American obesity has skyrocketed. Granted, it has a lot to do with the crap in our food and the amount of fast and junk food people consume and a couple of other factors, but I think the biggest thing is the core obsession with looks in society.
We now tell our daughters that they are beautiful just the way they are, and as a result, girls are no longer really taking care of themselves. That is not to say that men are not just as guilty of this, but I am using this as an example simply because it is easiest. I see so many overweight girls like myself, and they really see nothing wrong with how their bodies are. They think "I'm beautiful just the way I am and haters gonna hate."
The problem with this is, because they feel like there is nothing wrong with them, nothing changes. They continue to allow themselves to go downhill health wise because so little importance is placed on health in our society. Yeah, we've got looks covered. But regardless of what we might think, looks are still superficial as can be. We place so much importance on beauty over health, it's getting ridiculous.
I remember when I was a Junior in high school, an organization by the name of Healthy Is The New Skinny came to speak to us at a mandatory assembly. Before then, I had searched the web for information on this group, because at the time I had just gotten into the whole "health first, beauty second" thing, and I wanted to see what this group's stance was on the subject.
What I saw was no different than what I had seen. They were placing looks over health, trying to make it seem like their focus was health. The reason why I knew it was a facade was because I saw zero health focused articles, no tips for eating healthy or exercising, no interviews with doctors or health specialists or nutritionists. All I saw was pictures of full figured, very pretty models, clothes for a full figured body, Oprah- esue "You're beautiful" pep talk articles, and Healthy Is The New Skinny beauty contests. All of it was superficial and none of it was any different than was already present in society, they just went up a few dress sizes.
The best part? I literally saw them poking fun at skinnier people, saying that they were victims of society's view on beauty and blah blah blah. Which infuriated me. I personally know three skinny girls who literally cannot gain weight and are perpetually underweight as a result. It isn't their fault that they are the way they are. And yet these people who claim to promote a positive self image for girls hate on a full group of girls who are not "the new skinny". "The new skinny" just sounds like a fashion fad to me, something that will be tossed away in a few seasons and within a few years will be considered silly looking to the general masses.
What would impress me is a group that didn't care if they offended some people, that said that one thing that bigger people cannot accept: that being fat is unhealthy. Bottom line. You can kick and scream and insist that the sky is green, but in the end it is still blue, and you have no choice but to accept it.
But Ann, you say! You're big too; don't you feel insulted when people say you're unhealthy? No, actually. Hurt, yes, when people point it out. But the thing is, it keeps me grounded. It keeps me from buying into the "I'm beautiful the way I am" bullshit. Because that frame of mind is dangerous; if I didn't know that being fat was unhealthy, I wouldn't care, right? I would have no reason to. These girls that have the opposite mindset have been reeled into something far more dangerous than they realize because of the fact that perspective is very powerful.
Let me back up to better explain what I mean. I was once told "A lie told seven times becomes the truth". Honestly, it's kind of true. If you are convinced subconsciously that something is true, eventually it becomes your truth. It's the same thing here. These girls, while they are probably told in one way or another every day that they are unhealthy, society teaches them not to care, because they are beautiful the way they are, and that you shouldn't listen to what others say.
When someone says something about me or tells me something about myself, no matter how mean or cruel their delivery is, I always at least consider what they have to say. I am a firm believer that it's not what you say, it's how you say it, meaning that even if the person's delivery is terrible, they may have a good point. When these people tell me I'm unhealthy, I listen. Because they are right, and I don't want to hide behind society's "feel good" trump cards in order to make myself feel better about myself.
I am working on changing my "big girl" status. I walk whenever I get the chance to. I take the stairs. I steer clear from foods with trans fats, MSG, gluten, and saturated fat. I eat lots of salad with fresh veggies and a light dressing. I drink lots of water. And you know what? Even though my progress is slow, I am getting there. One day I will be completely fit and I will feel awesome.
If you are a fellow big girl, don't fall for the lie. Yes, you are beautiful. But you gotta be healthy too in order to truly believe it. So join me in saying no to society, and let's kick unhealthy in the ass together.
{Sidenote: Sorry it has been so long since I have written; my schedule has been crazy since I started working more hours. I should start doing this at least every other week from now on, although I am shooting for every week. Happy reading, my friends.}
